Okay, so we can’t blame everything on our spouses Mother and Father but let’s face it – a childhood does impact the future role as wife or husband.
If a hubs had a Mom who did everrrry.thing for him then he will have a strong tendency to expect his wife to do everrrrrrry.thing for him as well. If a young girl grew up having everything given to her on a silver platter – guess what – she’s going to expect a man to give her everything and more perhaps on a gold platter.
We train our kids in the teaching and admonition of the Lord. That just means we see what scripture says about how to function in life and we work under that philosophy of life. And we teach our kids by modeling and with words. With correction. With discipline. With lots and lots of grace. For them and for us.
When it’s easier to pick up your kids’ clothes off the floor because it’s just not “a battle worth fighting” in the grand scheme of things get a visual of your child’s future spouse saying, “Your Mama doesn’t live with you anymore!” Ha! Ha! No really – I get this struggle with some of the seemingly smaller things like messy rooms and leaving a mess behind in the kitchen. Because you’re thinking to yourself, “I just want him/her to make it in school, have good friends, stay away from drugs & sex – the big important stuff. Who cares if they leave tighty whities on the floor or wrappers on the table!”
And yes, I do think we need to choose our battles carefully. But I’m trying not to always dismiss the small things for the sake of the bigger things. Small things add up to big things eventually. I am raising a son and daughter to be a strong young man of God and a beautiful spirited Daughter of the King. But I’m also very likely raising a future wife and husband. And I pray for those spouses already. I pray for them in so many areas and I pray for their parents. I trust God is hearing our prayers on their behalf and I simply can’t wait to meet them one day. But until then I’ll keep working on the small things and leaving annoying friendly reminders as needed. And other times I’ll cave and just pick it up myself because everyone needs a Mama to back you up at times.